As a couples therapist, I see quite a great deal of miscommunication about sex between partners. And this is in the rare scenario where there is any communication at all. Generally, each partner thinks that the way they think about sex is obvious to the other, and nothing could be further from the truth. Here I come, like a psychology-wielding superhero, to vanquish common misunderstandings about sex for once and for all. Also, I create world peace. Here are the most common incorrect assumptions that men make about sex, with my rebuttals after each.
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These six sapiosexuals set the record straight on what it means to get turned on by a big brain. Woman A: Sapiosexual is a way for me to label and understand myself and what I want in a romantic relationship. Woman B: I am attracted to people who are intellectually stimulating. There is nothing sexier than sitting on a stoop at 4 A. Woman C: To me, a sapiosexual is someone who values an intellectual approach to the world, is a critical thinker, and has an insatiable curiosity in life, whether it be in work or in play, and is attracted to the same in a partner. Man A: Being sapiosexual means to me that it's really hard for me to have one night stands because generally speaking, I'm not really sexually interested in someone until I've seen that 'spark' in their personality, regardless of their level of physical beauty. Man B: It means that my perception of someone's intelligence is one of the most important factors in my attraction to them.
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It's widely believed that men are pretty much always in the mood for sex. Men's desire to get it on isn't seen as having much—if anything—to do with their relationships or life circumstances. Unlike women, it's assumed that guys are just constantly horny. However, a new study published in the Journal of Sex Research suggests that this stereotype about male sexuality is completely wrong and that men's sexual desire is much more complex than they've been given credit for. In fact, it actually has a lot to do with the emotional connection men have with their partners, which tells us that men and women are much more similar than they are different when it comes to the factors that predict desire.
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